Supervision

Certified Emotionally Focused Couples Therapist and Supervisor Candidate

My specialty is the intersection between Sex Therapy and Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy (EFT), all within the context of EFT.  

I am a Certified Emotionally Focused Couples Therapist and a Supervisor Candidate with the International Center for Excellence in Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy (ICEEFT).  Supervision with me will count towards your required Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy advanced supervision hours needed for (A) “Additional training” status.

I started studying EFT when I was an intern, and everything around me just started to make sense after that.   Over the years I’ve found that EFT effortlessly holds all my trainings and interests including somatic psychology, dance movement therapy, mindfulness, eastern psychology, trauma resolution, sex therapy, and psychodynamic transference/countertransference depth.  I love the structure that EFT gives and the science that infuses it, I believe in it, and it’s a powerful guide.  While in the beginning therapists might cling to that EFT map, ultimately we can never follow a formula.  EFT provides a foundation and frame in which supervisees can develop their unique way of dancing within and around it.

How do sex therapy and EFT go together?

How do we integrate sex therapy into Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy?  

This is a question I help my supervisees answer and integrate into their practice. I’ve personally been researching and asking this question as I complete my sex therapy certificate.  It was quite a shock after 8 years of only doing EFT training to branch out into a generalized sex therapy training which had only components of attachment.

I learned a couple of key things:

• As therapists we can feel awkward talking about sex, and this impedes our ability to help couples in this area.

• Most clients don’t know what’s ok to talk about and err on the side of not bringing sex up unless we know the questions and set the right context for them.  Unless we have training in doing so, we can cause more harm than hurt because talking about sex is VULNERABLE!

• In my biased opinion, having a foundation in Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy is absolutely essential in deepening intimate and sexual conversations with couples.  I feel strongly that therapists have to understand the nuances of attachment theory as it’s relevant to partnerships and systems first.

• Our normal human sexuality is wide and countlessly varied.   It’s acted out and/or imagined but regardless, everyone has a unique erotic template. The act of sex is only one component of sexuality. The brain (emotional and mental) is our strongest sexual organ.  And of course, clients’ relationship to their bodies and physical aliveness are also essential as we help them navigate their sexual cycles.